


Void

by orphan_account



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: F/M, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-18
Updated: 2015-10-18
Packaged: 2018-04-26 23:07:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 898
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5024134
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wanda doesn't know a way out of this darkness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Void

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I DON’T own anyone or anything. I DON’T own the characters. The fanfic is written for fun, NOT for profit.

She sat by herself, curled up in a ball, trying to make herself invisible, stop the freezing in the core of her chest and hold herself together in a desperate wish to not break apart even further. Wanda’s heart had been torn to pieces once the bullets had ripped through Pietro’s body. Nothing could fix the void that was growing deep within her, threatening to swallow her whole.

Wanda didn’t cry. Tears wouldn’t change the truth. She had experienced pain before, but with Pietro by her side, it had been bearable. Now…well, she doubted she would ever be okay again. She would keep going, yes. But one could be dead inside while the body kept functioning like a machine.

She felt a presence by her side then and wished she had gotten more distance between herself and the Avengers. She had followed them to their home, because there was nowhere else to go. She didn’t wish for their company though.

Motionlessly staring ahead at the view across famous New York City, she waited, but ignoring whoever had bothered to approach didn’t have the wished result. The person stayed and eventually, she looked up with a sigh.

“My condolences for your loss,” Thor said as she met his eyes. She had expected Barton by her side, maybe even Captain America. That the Asgardian member of the team would talk to her was unexpected, and so she only nodded when he asked if he could sit. She studied him as he took in the skyline before them before he turned to face her again. He looked hurt, she thought. Suffering from pain that sat deep and refused to go. She hadn’t noticed that before.

“I understand your pain,” he said then, voice quiet and soothing.

It didn’t help much.

“How would you know what I’m feeling?” she asked between gritted teeth. “How would you know what it’s like to feel like you’re…”

“Dead inside?” Thor completed for her, eyes never leaving hers. “I lost my brother as well. One might argue that it’s not the same as it seems like we loathed each other, but the truth is…I never truly felt anything like hate towards my brother.” He swallowed hard and Wanda felt he struggled to find his words. “For a thousand years, I lived with my brother Loki by my side. We grew up together, played together, laughed together, cried together. We fought side by side upon fields of battle. How could I possibly stop loving him when I learnt he wasn’t of my own blood?”

Thor sighed, shaking his head as his voice trailed off for a moment. His muscles grew tense as he braced himself on his knees and leaned forward. Wanda could see his pain more clearly now; it was visible in his every feature.

“I lost Loki once when he chose to fall into nothing rather than allowing me to save him,” he continued eventually. “It tore me apart, despite the hate he had shown towards me, despite his attempt at killing me. He was still my beloved brother, the one who’d been by my side for all my life. Then I found him again, as an enemy this time but still alive, and I wished so dearly for him to use a second chance. Fighting him was maddening, but nothing could compare to the pain I felt once he died in my arms. I held him when his soul left his body. It is but losing part of yourself.”

He met her gaze again once he had finished his speech, and no longer did Wanda wish for him to leave. She could feel an understanding between them, quiet and gentle. It felt like a loving caress against her cheeks, like a hand upon her shoulder of someone who knew. Who knew exactly what it was like.

“How did you learn to live with it?” she choked out, voice no more than a whisper. “How do you make the pain go away?”

“It won’t ever fully leave you,” Thor answered honestly. “It will always be part of your being, but so will be your love for him. Eventually, you will learn to live with it. There is little you can do but give yourself time to grief. Cry if you must. Share the burden with those who care for you. It’s easier to carry then. And one day, you might wake up, think of him and smile rather than cry. You know he’s missing, but you’ve come to accept it.”

“Are you there yet?” Wanda wanted to know. “Have you accepted?”

Thor held her gaze for a moment before he shook his head again. The honesty of this wordless gesture was all it took to break her barrier for good. Wanda allowed the tears to rise, even to fall. They wouldn’t change anything, wouldn’t return Pietro to her, but maybe they could release some of the sickening tension in the depth of her chest, in her throat. She closed her eyes as she rested her head against his shoulder, sighed as he wrapped an arm around hers in a comforting embrace. She didn’t know if she would ever be okay again. If she could accept. It took time, as it seemed, even for Thor. Maybe, one day, the wound would close enough to leave no more than an ugly scar upon her soul.


End file.
